We live in a society where female ways of being are still commonly viewed as second-best, where too much feminine energy can be an obstacle to being taken seriously, where women are expected to conform to stereotypically male communication patterns and expectations in order to have a career and real power. Too often it’s a choice between embracing who you really are and getting what you want in life.
An entire section of the rules was devoted to censoring depictions of homosexuality. “Intimate activities (holding hands, touching, kissing) between homosexual lovers” were censored, as were “reports of homosexual groups, including news, characters, music, tv show, pictures”. Similarly blocked was content about “protecting rights of homosexuals (parade, slogan, etc.)” and “promotion of homosexuality”.
The U.S. and UK governments are expected to sign a treaty in October that will force social media platforms based in either of the countries to “disclose encrypted messages from suspected terrorists, paedophiles and other serious criminals” to police in the other, according to the Times of London.
Comment tu peux transmettre le contenu de messages chiffrés que tu n'es pas sensé pouvoir déchiffrer ? 🤔
Oops.
It’s a survival mechanism, especially as someone with depression and anxiety, to try to ignore and normalize the dehumanizing experiences I have to move through in order to live. If I were to allow myself to be bothered by quotidian microaggressions and invalidations and othering, I’d maybe never leave the house.
Some writers map their sentences metrically, marking the stressed and unstressed syllables with scansion marks as if notating a musical score. Some even work out the stresses before they fill in the words. The rest of us just have a foggy sense that a sentence needs an extra beat. But we still know that a sentence is not just what it says but how it says it.
La nomination de Tristan Nitot servira d'abord à redorer le blason de Qwant dans la presse et les médias, mais également à éliminer de la direction de l'entreprise la seule personne susceptible d'essayer de pouvoir tenir tête à Léandri.
« Nitot est tout sauf un administratif ou un opérationnel : c'est un speaker, hors sol et totalement sous la coupe de Léandri. Son rôle : danser devant les journalistes, nu s'il le faut. »
There are plenty of well-documented reasons to distrust Instagram — the platform where one is never not branding, never not making Facebook money, never not giving Facebook one’s data — but most unnerving are the ways in which it has led me to distrust myself. After countless adventures through the black hole, my propensity to share, perform, and entertain has melded with a desire far more cynical: to be liked, quantifiably, for an idealized version of myself, at a rate not possible even ten years ago.
Dating. Am I good at it? What qualifies as good at it? For me, dating was always about the effort. I put effort into my dates under the (gargantuanly misguided) notion that effort nets result. I do my hair and makeup, pull a lewk, and put on my optimism and positivity panties before walking out the door. I ask thoughtful questions and come prepared with morsels of information gleaned from their profiles so as to ensure my dates never feels void of conversation topic or connection. I put my best effort forward, because I believe — sorry, believed — dating is an activity worth the effort.
21 ans que je vois des sales merdeux instrumentaliser le suicide de gars comme mon père pour éviter de parler des violences faites aux femmes par les hommes. Je dis de gars comme mon père parce qu’il cochait comme la majorité des hommes qui se suicident toutes les cases ; moyen utilisé, raisons, incapacité de parler etc. Ces gens s’en contrefoutent en général puisque le moindre mec qui oserait exprimer son mal être sur les réseaux sociaux est moqué, vilipendé, voire poussé au suicide. Qu’on ne vienne donc pas me prétendre que le suicide des mecs les intéressent c’est un mensonge, une sale petite instrumentalisation. Les mecs sont tellement mal à l'aise avec la fragilité masculine que c'est le seul argument qu'ils sont en bouche d'ailleurs lorsqu'il s'agit de contrer la propagande masculiniste et fasciste de certains. "Halala qu'est ce qu'il est fragile" braillent-ils face à un masculiniste comme si le problème était là.
les interdictions de la GPA n’arrêtent pas le commerce des bébés mais l’alimentent en réalité de manière à rendre les travailleuses gestationnelles beaucoup plus vulnérables qu’auparavant. Comme pour le travail du sexe, la question d’être pour ou contre la GPA n’est donc pas pertinente. Il s’agit plutôt de savoir pourquoi il est considéré comme normal d’être davantage opposé à la GPA qu’à d’autres formes de travails risqués et quels sont les effets de cette posture de charité sur les personnes qui exercent actuellement ce travail ?
The uncompromising outrage of activists and survivors has no doubt drawn important attention to sexual misconduct and egregious criminal behavior. Outrage brings awareness to long-buried issues in desperate need of justice. Outrage has resulted in the #MeToo movement, the formation of Time’s Up and the galvanization on display at the annual Women’s March. Outrage is a righteous and necessary vanguard in a free society.
Outrage is different from sex panic, however. The former exposes; the latter silences. Panic rejects nuance, debate and disagreement in favor of party lines and swift action. Panic has resulted in the rise of cancel culture and the dismissal of due process. By the time we can consider whether we’re in a full-blown cultural panic, rational thinking has already been cast aside. It becomes risky to ask for facts and data. In a sex panic, it becomes imprudent to question the extent to which sex-based discrimination exists. It becomes dangerous to suggest that all sexual violations, and all experiences of sexual violence, are not equivalent. As a consequence, we learn to shut up and sit down lest we face public condemnation and risk being attacked on the internet.
And in 2013, when the oldest Millennials were in their early 30s, Tinder became available to smartphone users everywhere. Suddenly dates too (or sex, or phone sex) could be set up without so much as a single spoken word between two people who had never met. In the years since, app dating has reached such a level of ubiquity that a couples therapist in New York told me last year that he no longer even bothers asking couples below a certain age threshold how they met. (It’s almost always the apps, he said.)
She was hurt by this, and seemed unable to understand why I was unwilling to continue a quasi-romantic relationship with someone for whom my feelings, my intimacy, my body, was the equivalent of a day at a theme park, a fun and whimsical distraction from the everyday. I didn’t feel scorned or heartbroken; I felt used and objectified. Beth saw no harm in using me to make herself feel good because, in her mind, my feelings and sexuality were somehow less legitimate than her own—which is, of course, the very essence of heteronormativity and homophobia.
Dans son livre Histoire de la violence, Edouard Louis, alors qu’il évoque la mort d’une petite fille dont la mère est en partie tenue pour responsable, évoque la circulation de la haine et de la violence. Il écrit que «la haine pour la mère, la haine s’était déplacée sur d’autres personnes, à croire que c’est un sentiment qui ne peut par nature jamais disparaître mais seulement passer d’un corps à l’autre, se transférer d’un groupe à l’autre, d’une communauté à l’autre, (...) la haine n’a pas besoin d’individus particuliers pour exister mais uniquement de foyers pour se réincarner».
Even Darling, who believes that the way we treat robots mirrors our ideas about empathy and kindness, agrees the ethics aren’t always clear. “Even though it’s clearly wrong to punch a person, you get into ethical questions very quickly where it’s not always so clear what the answer is,” she says. “Is it OK to punch a person who’s trying to punch you? Is it OK to punch a Nazi?”
Feminist pedagogy alone is inadequate to the barriers facing women, people of color, and queer people in institutions of higher education. Instead, we should look toward changing the institutions that structure our teaching. Just as we teach students to contextualize the texts and people we study, we must understand our classrooms as products of the broader university environment.
Dans les années 1980, alors qu’elle luttait contre le cancer, Audre Lorde a affirmé que de prendre soin d’elle-même était « un acte de guerre politique ». Depuis, le self-care est devenu un mot à la mode dans les milieux activistes. La rhétorique du self-care est passée de spécifique à universelle, de provocative à obligatoire. Lorsqu’on parle de self-care aujourd’hui, parle-t-on de la même chose que Lorde ?
The community that I have spent my entire adult life working and living in sometimes feels even more dangerous and volatile than the mainstream, cis and heteronormative world that I spent my teen years trying to escape. After all, I can at least blame the cruelty of straight, cis society on homophobia and transphobia. But why are queers so mean to queers?
A TSA agent may press the button that corresponds to the sex a passenger was assigned at birth, but the passenger's gender presentation may mean using a chest binder, packer, or breast shaper, which the machine then marks as inconsistent with the expected algorithm for the passenger's sex, thus triggering an "alarm." Alternatively, the agent may press the button corresponding to the passenger's presenting gender rather than the sex they were assigned at birth, which poses its own problems: A "passing" trans woman's penis, for example, will register to the machine as suspicious.